Abandoning a friend without a word may seem the best solution for an emotionally challenging situation. However, you can cause more damage if you do, not just to your friend who is left wondering what happened but also to yourself. If you do it once, you can do it again unless you get why it is not okay to do.

The Urban Dictionary defines ghosting as “a person [who] cuts off all communication with their friends… with zero warning or notice beforehand. You’ll mostly see them avoiding friend’s phone calls, social media, and avoiding them in public.”*  Ghosting is not a joke you play with your friends. It can leave deep scars in people’s lives. But just as important, it can create toxic behavior in you. You can’t handle the situation. You run. You can’t tell the truth about the situation. You run. You don’t know what to do. You run. Unless you are in danger because of a friendship, don’t run. Instead, face it head-on. Ask God for wisdom, and ask others you trust about what you should do. Then, compare their advice to God’s and choose what God would want you to do.

Fear keeps us from being able to face situations, but God has not given us a spirit of fear. He has given us power, love, and a sound mind. See 2 Timothy 1:7. It is our right to not feel afraid. If you take time to sit down with your friend and explain that you want to take a break or that there is an issue you need to handle together, you may find yourself actually experiencing healing instead of a broken friendship. You may think you would never do it to anyone, but even the closest people to Jesus ghosted him when he faced crucifixion. See our main lesson Who Is on the Lord’s Side? From Hosanna to Crucify Him. 

Jacqui Wilson




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